Tuesday, January 04, 2011
2010 in hindsight

2010 was all about personal growth. It was about stepping outside my comfort zone, peeling away the layers of bubble wrap and adjusting to this whole new world around me. Its crazy how time has flown in the last 12 months. It did feel like eternity at times, but the realization that i've been in England for a year is mindblowing. This time one year ago i was still in my naive little subang coccoon, contented and happy.

Coming here has changed me. And i'm not sure if it's for the better. I think in the past year, i've felt more anger or despair than i've ever felt in my life. I knew people can be selfish and offensive but i could choose to avoid them. Its the constant disregard of concord and grace thats battering me left, right, center and i'm wallowed in bitterness. Its the pettiness driving me up the wall. Things have been farcical. Surely there has to be a limit to how much people can irritate you, but nothing surprises me anymore.

It's probably not the best of starts to the year harbouring hostilities, but it has made me into a steelier person. Im not afraid anymore to say 'up yours' anymore if you thread on my toes. At the same time, i appreciate acts of goodwill even more. My new year resolution is to focus on the intermediate exam ahead and then the very much awaited job application. The chance to get as far away as possible, working in the vicinity of much loved ones. Up till a few days ago, my resolution was to work towards that happiness. A very wise Julian Baker reminded me that happiness is not a destination. Therefore, my other 2011 resolution, no matter how tough it may be, is to enjoy the journey as much as possible. so that when i look back at these tough times in the future, i can say my final years as a student was worth it.